Why we end up parenting like our parents

The latest in parenting news, tips, and trends:

Why we can make the same mistakes as our parents, even if we don’t want to like them. Good news: Just being aware can help. 

How to talk to your kids about war, depending on their age. Pro-tip: Take some time to process your own feelings first.

A new study suggesting more dads should be screened for postpartum depression. Results showed triple the rates of PPD than expected.

How early intervention programs are failing some toddlers with developmental delays. Parents are waiting months (even years) for help.

Why a group of Hispanic doulas is pushing to diversify care for pregnant women and reduce the maternal mortality rate. They're trying to close a gap in care. 

Last week, we asked you to vote on a question to answer. The winner was:

What’s the best way to get my baby to engage in tummy time?

FEATURED EXPERT:

Stephanie Choi, RN, MS

Pediatric nurse practitioner at Stanford Medicine Children’s Health

“Some babies may have a harder time tolerating tummy time than others. There are some helpful techniques that may make tummy time more enjoyable for your baby. 

“One technique is to place them on their tummy with interesting objects in front of them, [like] high contrast, black and white pictures or a mirror. It can also be helpful for a parent to get down on the ground at eye level with the baby and talk to them. 

“There are also some modified tummy time positions. For younger infants, chest-to-chest time with parents sitting up and slightly reclined is often well tolerated. Another technique is having parents sit on a flat surface with knees bent and having the baby lay over their knees. 

“For older infants, placing a cushion, rolled-up towel, or baby blanket under the baby’s chest … can help make tummy time more enjoyable and allow them to see objects in front of them more easily. The American Academy of Pediatrics also offers resources on tummy time.”

Parent-centered advice, recs, and resources.

How BIPOC Women Can Combat Racial Bias in Maternal Care

If you’re a pregnant woman of color trying to navigate maternal care, it’s important you know your care options and create a support system around you, says Linda Sloan Locke, a certified nurse midwife, licensed social worker, and the lead midwife at Wolomi, a pregnancy and motherhood support community for women of color.

How you can advocate for yourself, according to Sloan Locke:

• Interview your providers: Don’t be afraid to switch if you're uncomfortable with the service you’ve received or if your questions are not being answered. Trust your gut. If it feels like a microaggression, it is, says Sloan Locke. You can also become familiar with anti-racism in healthcare — a good starting point is the Black Birthing Bill of Rights.

• Put yourself first: Self-advocacy means speaking up for yourself and the things that are important to you. Calmly demand respect. Your wishes and rights should be honored and your care should be compassionate and holistic. 

• Assemble your tribe: Have a support group (a significant other, close friend, or relative) who you can depend on for support and validation. They must have your feelings and values at the forefront. 

• Consider a midwife, doula, or both: The midwifery philosophy of care is person-centered, and midwives believe in partnering with you. A full-spectrum doula can be an invaluable source of information and support as you try to navigate the system. 

• Check out your birthing site: Even the best provider can be undermined by biased hospital staff. Have a frank talk with your provider and other women of color to understand how they were treated. If you have options, consider them, and if not, bolster your team to advocate for you.

Name Labels That'll Save You a Trip to the Lost & Found

Whether it’s for daycare or all the times your kid asks, "Where's my [enter item here?]" — the Name Bubbles name labels are for you. They’re customizable and stick to just about anything (baby bottles, lunch boxes, notebooks, toys, and sports gear). Choose from fun fonts, colors, designs, and pictures (like a rainbow, sloth, or a truck). They’re pretty adorable.

The best part? The labels are durable: They’re dishwasher, microwave, and freezer safe — they just won’t work on silicone or rubber surfaces. Name Bubbles also makes a custom label specifically for clothing that won’t come off in the laundry. 

Is it magic? With a 4.8-star rating on Amazon, some reviewers certainly think so. One customer says, “I have a different design for each kid which helps me and them figure out what belongs to whom… I put them on clothes, lunchboxes, backpacks, folders... you name it! Super functional, adorable, and convenient.”